Differing Circumstances
by Koichi
Summary: [InuKai] Sometimes, you have to choose between what you can have and what you want to have. And love becomes a luxury when you shoulder more responsibility……would kaidoh choose between love or responsibility?
1. Differing Circumstances

Title: Differing Circumstances

Author: Koichi

Series: Prince of Tennis

Pairing: InuKai

SongFic inspirsed by Purest of Pain

Italics- lyrics

Summary: Sometimes, you have to choose between what you can have and what you want to have. And love becomes a luxury when you shoulder more responsibility……

"Moshi Moshi…" the voice of the only son of the Inui household traveled through the phone, but what greeted him was silence. Mentally counting the odds of whether it was a prank call, Inui Sadaharu decided to hang up the phone.

_Sorry didn't mean to call you but I couldn't fight it  
I guess I was weak, couldn't even hide it  
and so I surrendered, just to hear your voice._  
  
It has been six months, 4 days and 30 minutes since the moment he told him that they should break up, and every night that same line repeats itself in his dream.

"I am sorry sempai."

But he couldn't resist seeing his face again, so he was here at Shohoku High, watching him play the qualifying matches to the Nationals, hoping to see him play, his smiling face when he wins, and the concentration that he displays when he is into the match. The sky darkens as the clouds begun to gather, covering the sun and bringing showers to the court. The sound of thunder resounded, and the droplets of watch continued to bring it nutrishment to the earth. With no sign of the rain stopping soon, the two teams decided that they had no choice but to postpone the match to a later date when the weather was better. Inui concluded that this wasn't his lucky day. Not only he wasn't able to watch Kaidoh play his match as captain of the team, he was drenched by the rain. Casting one last longing look at the boy with his ever present green bandana, he turned his back towards the court and walked away.

It could be a twisted play of fate as at that moment when Inui was leaving, Kaidoh caught sight of the spiky head and familiar gleam of the reflective glasses that he always wore. He felt a pang of guilt and heartache course through his body as he watched the lonely figure disappearing through the sheets of water.

"Sempai!" he thought his ears were playing tricks on him when he heard that voice. He thought that because he wished that this would happen so much that his mind created the mirage of the man in front of him. However, perhaps there was a God and he was beginning to take pity of him, because Kaidoh was indeed standing in front of him, holding an umbrella over him. "Sempai….I…." Kaidoh stuttered, not knowing what to say. He didn't even understand why he chased up to Inui, but he did and he was standing in front of him now. "…I think you would need this." Kaidoh continued, holding the handle of the umbrella towards Inui. The data tennis player smiled, as he took hold of the umbrella from Kaidoh, their fingers brushing pass in an instant as Kaidoh retracted his hand like he was shocked by the touch. "The umbrella wouldn't be much of a use when I am soaking wet right? But thank you." Inui said. Feeling a blush coming up his face, Kaidoh muttered a quick excuse and ran back into the school ground, but this incident created an opportunity for Inui to look for him again.

_Don't know how many times I said I'm gonna live without you,  
and maybe someone else is standing there beside you,  
but there's something, baby you need to know.  
That deep inside me, I feel like I'm dying. I have to see you;  
it's all that I'm asking._  
  
Exactly one week after their meeting in the rain, Inui decided that it was time to pay Kaidoh a visit to return the umbrella that he had loaned him. This one week, he felt more alive than anytime in the past year ever since he broke up with him. There was hope that he could recover the relationship that Kaidoh and he once shared, and this hope pushed him on. Entering the school ground, he headed towards the tennis courts to see Kaidoh having a practice match with his team mate. Not wanting to disturb him he stood in the corner and watched on, mentally assessing how much he had improved over the period of time that they didn't meet. Time passed quickly as he watched the match proceed in favor of Kaidoh. Soon the practice was over and he approached the mamushi after he dispersed the group.

"You have improved." Inui remarked as he walked toward him, catching his attention. "Thank you." Then an awkward silent reigned until Inui cleared his throat, "Your umbrella," he said, passing the item back into his hands, but it was as if the heaven wanting to create an opportunity for them, it started to rain again. Instinctively, Inui opened the umbrella and pulled Kaidoh closer to him to shelter the pair. Kaidoh first reaction was to pull away, but soon found out that it wasn't a good idea as his right arm would be exposed to the rain, therefore he moved closer, although still trying to keep a gap between them.

"Shall we have dinner together?"

"Hai…." Until now he still couldn't refuse his ex-sempai and ex-lover.

_Vida, give me back my fantasy. The courage that I need to live,  
the air that I breathe.  
Cariño mio, my world's become so empty. The days are so cold and lonely  
and each night I taste the purest of pain.  
  
_

It didn't take long before the rain was reduced to a drizzle, as the pair entered a family restaurant and was seated beside the window. Watching the pedestrians walk pass in the dwindling light, Kaidoh tried his best not to look at Inui. He was afraid, afraid that he would fall for the man sitting in front of him again. That face, that voice, and even the way he smiles, had not changed for the six months that they didn't meet. He allowed his thoughts to drift back to the happier times when they were together. However it seems that the relationship was doomed even before it started, because he couldn't bring himself to go against the traditional upbringing that he was brought up with. He was the eldest son of the family and it was his responsibility to carry on his family line and his younger brother. So he chose responsibility over happiness, but try as he might, he could never forget the times they had together.

"Kaidoh?" Inui looked at the boy who had been stirring the same cup of tea for around five minutes. "Kaidoh?" he called again, this time louder, but like the previous attempt, it fell onto deaf ears. "Kaidoh!" he tried for the last time, reaching out at the same time to tap on the hand that was holding the cup. The contact jolted Kaidoh out of his thoughts causing his hands to jerk, toppling the cup and its contents at the same time, the scalding hot water leaving angry red marks on Kaidoh's hand. Concerned, Inui got out of his chair and went towards Kaidoh, holding up his hands, he said, "I think you'd better run your hands under cold water, or there might be a 40 chance that……" Before he could finish, Kaidoh retracted his hand and ran out of the restaurant.

"Kaidoh!" Realising that he was causing a scene, Inui took out his wallet and threw some notes on the table before grabbing the umbrella that Kaidoh left behind in his rush and dashed out after him. The droplets of water sliding off his spectacles told him that it was still drizzling and it wasn't healthy for Kaidoh to be running under the rain. Quickening his steps, he finally caught up with the boy at the final turn before reaching his house.

"Kaoru!" This was the first time after six months that he heard that voice call him with his given name. He didn't want to stop, because he didn't know how to face him. But, it seemed that the heavens were against him as he felt the vice like grab on his shoulders. Much like the times where the regulars would try to escape from the Inui juice, and he would grab hold of them to make sure they can't run away. "Your umbrella." Inui simply said, thrusting the item into his hands, "You have matches coming up, you can't get sick now." After finishing what he said, he left, turning his back against Kaidoh.

Gazing at the lonely silhouette of the man, Kaidoh could feel the bitter bile build up at the back of his throat as his vision started to cloud with tears. "Sempai I……"

Turning back to face him, Inui smiled. The same knowing and understanding smile that he showed him that day when he had asked to end their relationship. "Kaidoh, I will wait for you as long as time permits."

Shohoko High: Anyone familiar with the series Slam Dunk would know that Shohoku is a school located in Kanagawa.

Yes…Kaidoh is in Kanagawa now.

Author's notes:

angst fic! I can't believe I actually went ahead and wrote it.

Anyway….the fic idea came when I heard the song Purest of Pain by Son by Four on the radio late in the middle of the night.

In the end I repeated the song so many times in the process of writing the whole fic that I started to feel sad a some point or another.

I couldn't decide on the ending, therefore I ended up writing 2. Do try and read both.


	2. Differing Circumstances Happy Ending

_I'll wait for you…… _

That phrase kept repeating in his head like a broken recorder, but as much as he found it irritating, there was a sense of warmth that bubbled in his heart. This left him reassured but troubled, torn between his feelings of love and responsibility. He didn't sleep well that night, but drifted in the state of semi-consciousness. Between those moments he dreamt, to be more precise, he remembered the times that they were together. The gentle touches, the soothing voice of comfort, the smile, the passionate interludes and most importantly the bubbling warmth within his heart. He didn't realize it until then, how much he missed those moments. For the six months that went by, he buried himself in work, his new found leadership of the team and adjusting his new life in Kanagawa.

It was a relationship that was built over his insecurity and despite being bathed in his love, Kaidoh knew that one day he might leave him. Just because he was the eldest son and it was his duty to carry on the family line, and to provide his parents with grandchildren. Some may scoff at his old-fashion thinking, but he couldn't help it. It was the way he was bought up. He decided to end this relationship the day his father told the family that he was transferred to a branch in Kanagawa. And the family was to leave with him.

_"I am sorry sempai……"_

To put the distance between them, he built a wall to separate them. He knew he was selfish for picking such a moment to bring up the issue, when it was so close to his entrance exams for university, but he did it anyway. What surprised him was Inui's attitude when he placed his thought across. Overly calm wouldn't do justice to it, he felt his heart breaking when he saw his sempai sorrowful eyes. But he was so understanding of his position and so willing to let him go that it made him feel guilty. Kaidoh felt like he was a willful child and he was a loving parent. However when he saw his face again a week ago, he begin to wonder, whether he had regretted his decision.

_I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better every day  
that it didn't hurt me when you walked away  
but to tell you the truth I can't find my way  
and deep inside me I feel like I'm dying  
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking._

That morning wasn't an enjoyable affair for him, as he tried to shrug off the grogginess of sleep by splashing his face with cold water as an added effort to wake himself up. The day went by uneventfully, as Kaidoh put all his energy in his classes in an attempt to concentrate on his lesson, fighting off the beckoning of the sandman. The situation didn't improve even when tennis training started. There was a significant drop in his stamina during the warm up laps, although he tried his best to hide it, it didn't escape the coach's sharp observation. When asked what was wrong with him, he didn't reply but told his coach that he was alright and didn't need to rest. Which was something that he learnt to regret later.

"Buchou, look out!" It was a warning that came too late. When he looked up, Kaidoh was just in time to see the tennis ball going for his face. Had he been paying attention during the practice match with his fukubuchou, he would have return the ball. In a feeble attempt to avoid getting hit in the face, Kaidoh twisted his head to the side and used his racquet to block the ball.

Kaidoh's racquet fall unto the court as he held his wrist in pain. Due to the angle and the force of the ball combined with the incorrect grip on Kaidoh's part, he had sprain his wrist. Leaving Kaidoh to ice his sore wrist, the coach dispersed the gathering crowd made up of the other regulars who were all concern of their captain's well-being. The coach, who was a rather matured man of his late thirties, a change from the female coach that he was used to, took out the first-aid kit and started to bandage the wrist.

"So what is on your mind today?" the man took a look at the wrist and decided that the swelling had gone down enough for him to start bandage.

"Nothing, Ishikawa-sensei, just tired, that's all." Pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose, Ishikawa sighed. He knew that he wasn't going to get anything out of the reserved boy, if he wasn't ready to talk about it.

"There, all done." The older man said as he placed the last tape to hold the bandage in place. "I would still recommend you to go see a doctor about it though," he continued as he replaced the items of the first-aid kit back. "And go home and rest for a bit and sort out your problem soon. You are their captain, it wouldn't do for you to be distracted." Nodding his head, Kaidoh stood up bowing slightly he replied, "Thank you, Ishikawa-sensei."

As he was leaving, he saw a girl running towards the court. He recognized her, the short black hair, with pins to hold back the fringe from irritating the eye. She was a junior from the women tennis team of the school, at the same time the girlfriend of his vice-captain; he stopped to see what she was planning to do.

"Amamiya-kun, you forgot your bottle for training!" Kaidoh heard her say as the vice-captain walked up towards her. "You shouldn't have taken the trouble to come by. Didn't you say that you have a test tomorrow?" the gentle reply of his vice-captain was heard as he came up to her to take the bottle from her, at that moment their fingers overlapped each other's.

_Vida, give me back my fantasy. The courage that I need to live,  
the air that I breathe.  
Cariño mio, my world's become so empty. The days are so cold and lonely  
and each night I taste the purest of pain.  
  
_

The phone at the Inui residence rang again. Footsteps was heard before the phone was picked up, "Moshi Moshi? Inui residence." Being the only one at home at the moment, Inui Sadaharu had no choice but to answer the phone.

"Sempai?" came a strangled reply, but he recognized the voice at once.

"Kaidoh?" he asked, but was greeted with silence, "Kaoru?" he tired again, concern evident in the voice.

"Gomen nasai sempai…." The call then ended abruptly.

"_I am sorry sempai…."_ It was the same phrase that Kaoru had told when he asked to end the relationship, and today he repeated the same line to him again. Did it meant that there was no chance for them to resume their previous relationship? Inui didn't want to think of such a possibility but his mind couldn't stop steering the thoughts towards that direction. He stood frozen at the spot as the phone slipped out of his grasp, but he made no move to pick it up. The silence in the room was deafening, as the sound of water dripping onto hard surface was audible. Slender fingers ghosted passed the porcelain white face, feeling the moisture. He didn't realize that he was crying.

_I'm sorry I didn't mean to call you but I couldn't fight it.  
I guess I was weak, couldn't even hide it  
and so I surrendered just to hear your voice._

By the time he reached Tokyo, it was already evening, and the dark clouds had started to gather overhead. He had not told anyone about his trip back to his old hometown, much less informed his parents. For once, he couldn't care less whether he was going to arrive home late, because he made this decision in the heat of the moment, and he knew that if he was given time to think about it, he wouldn't have went through with it.

That moment when he saw what was shared between Amamiya and his girlfriend, it struck a chord in his heart. For that moment, that overlapping of fingers of the couple reminded him of Inui's match with the Rikkai Dai's third single Yanagi. At that point of time, the data man was still courting him. As he passed him the green towel after the match and congratulated the upper-class man, their hands overlapped each other's as well. He couldn't forget that moment, the heat of Inui's hands after the game that was warm and reassuring. Perhaps it was at that point, when he came to terms that he loved that man, and when the scene replayed itself the feelings were still there, it might even be stronger.

He couldn't wait.

The evening started as the clouds gave way and sheets of pearl like droplets rained upon the ground, much like he was feeling now. Inui stared at the sketch book in front of him as he flipped through the pages. In it was photos, notes, memories of their love together. Kaidoh was embarrassed when he found out that he was making a detailed record of the events that happened between them. He still remembered the blush on his face. Inui once joked that when they are old and wrinkled, they would sit in the porch and flip through these books remembering about the time when they were still hot-blooded youths.

He should really burn the book now.

The knock on the door was sudden, as he begins to wonder who would be visiting on such a rainy day. It was impossible to be any of his parents' friends as they were out of the country, and none of his friend had informed him that they would be visiting. As the door opened, the sight surprised him. It was Kaidoh, totally drenched and dripping wet from the rain. He noticed the bandaged wrist immediately and noted that he was in his tennis jersey and was still carrying his racquet bag; he just came from school. What shocked him more was his actions afterward, as Kaidoh without warning, dropped what he was carrying and hugged him.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry…." The voice was lost in the sobs, but Inui could no longer recognize whether they were his tears or the rain water wetting his shirt. His mind had lost the ability to process logical thoughts for the moment, as he looked at the boy that was embracing him. Could he interpret this the way he wanted to?

The words he heard confirmed his thoughts, "Could you give me another chance?" Kaidoh said with conviction in his voice, and like the sun it drove away the dark clouds in Inui's heart. There was no better reply than the passionate kiss they shared at the doorway, which cemented the foundation for their second love.

Author Notes:

Finally! I have finished the Happy Ending…Why is it so long?!

Please read the Sad Ending as well?

I think I tortured Inui too much in this fic, I even made him cry. I am so sorry Inui.

dies of Aozu


	3. Differing Circumstances Sad Ending

_I'll wait for you…… _

That phrase kept repeating in his head like a broken recorder, but as much as he found it irritating, there was a sense of warmth that bubbled in his heart. This left him reassured but troubled, torn between his feelings of love and responsibility. He didn't sleep well that night, but drifted in the state of semi-consciousness. Between those moments he dreamt, to be more precise, he remembered the times that they were together. The gentle touches, the soothing voice of comfort, the smile, the passionate interludes and most importantly the bubbling warmth within his heart. He didn't realize it until then, how much he missed those moments. For the six months that went by, he buried himself in work, his new found leadership of the team and adjusting his new life in Kanagawa.

It was a relationship that was built over his insecurity and despite being bathed in his love, Kaidoh knew that one day he might leave him. Just because he was the eldest son and it was his duty to carry on the family line, and to provide his parents with grandchildren. Some may scoff at his old-fashion thinking, but he couldn't help it. It was the way he was bought up. He decided to end this relationship the day his father told the family that he was transferred to a branch in Kanagawa. And the family was to leave with him.

_"I am sorry sempai……"_

To put the distance between them, he built a wall to separate them. He knew he was selfish for picking such a moment to bring up the issue, when it was so close to his entrance exams for university, but he did it anyway. What surprised him was Inui's attitude when he placed his thought across. Overly calm wouldn't do justice to it, he felt his heart breaking when he saw his sempai sorrowful eyes. But he was so understanding of his position and so willing to let him go that it made him feel guilty. Kaidoh felt like he was a willful child and he was a loving parent. However when he saw his face again a week ago, he begin to wonder, whether he had regretted his decision.

_I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better every day  
that it didn't hurt me when you walked away  
but to tell you the truth I can't find my way  
and deep inside me I feel like I'm dying  
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking._

The next morning Kaidoh woke up at the sound of his alarm. Sitting up, a wave of dizziness hit him, like an invisible force pushing him back onto the bed. Gingerly, he got out of bed and staggered down the stairs slowly, a step at a time. By the time he reached the dinning table, a good 15 minutes had already past.

"Kaoru, are you alright?" his mother immediately sensed his discomfort. Wiping her hands clean on her apron, she laid the palm of her hand on his forehead. "You are having a fever. Go back to bed, I will phone the school and inform them that you are not going today." Having said that, she ushered him back up the stairs and tucked him into the bed he just got up from not long ago. He could still feel the lingering body heat that was left behind by him this morning. Back into the comfort of his bed, the heavy eyelids began to weigh down and slid shut.

When he was a child, he used to imagine that in the future he would have a family just like the one he has now. With a loving wife who was the caring mother of his children, two children and his parents would visit regularly if not, stayed with him. He didn't count on falling in love with the sport, tennis. If he didn't, then perhaps he would never have met the man called Inui Sadaharu. He remembered when he moved to Kanagawa, it was like he was escaping from his life. He gave very little people his new contact details, hoping that he would not be able to find him. However, another more surprising character did eventually. He was Yanagi Renji, Inui's childhood friend. It would be a lie if he said that he was never jealous of the relationship that Yanagi and Inui shared in the past, the bond that ran so deep that when they were together, Kaidoh felt that he couldn't come in between them. He, in the end Inui choose him, the mamushi, the boy whom they all thought had an attitude problem.

_"How could you?"_

He remembered Yanagi confronting him one afternoon when he was on his way home from school. Although he knew that the Rikkai Dai player was in Kanagawa, he didn't expect to bump into him that easily.

"How could you? Do you know how devastated he is now?" the usually calm man had grabbed him by his collar, at such a close proximity he could almost feel the rage radiating from his body. Perhaps he really wasn't the one that was suitable to stand by his side.

That day he didn't answer Yanagi's question, and after that day he didn't see Yanagi again. __

_Vida, give me back my fantasy. The courage that I need to live,  
the air that I breathe.  
Cariño mio, my world's become so empty. The days are so cold and lonely  
and each night I taste the purest of pain.  
  
_

It didn't take long for the fever to be broken. In fact, if he didn't suffer from insomnia the night before, he wouldn't have fallen prey to the germs. He stood in front of the gates of Rikkai Dai University, after a moment of hesitation, he stepped into unfamiliar grounds. It wasn't hard to find the tennis courts, and with a stroke of luck, the members of the Rikkai Dai tennis club was there practicing. He saw a few familiar faces, namely Sanada and Yukimura. Of course Yanagi was there as well, and spotted him soon enough after he saw Yukimura whispering something into his ears. He approached him almost immediately, and as if he could read Kaidoh's thoughts, he spoke, "Are you here about Sadaharu?"

He had came up with the conclusion that he wasn't the one suitable for his sempai. Perhaps he didn't love him enough in the first place, but more importantly he wasn't brave enough and his cowardliness was hurting the man. He shouldn't be so selfish. What Inui needed was someone brave enough to tread this uncharted part with him.

It was raining again like many of their recent encounters. Apart from that, the scene unfolding before them was much like a replay of the scene six months again. It was in the park, where Kaidoh gentlely broke the news to Inui.

"I am sorry…."

And like the previous encounter, Inui stood still on the spot absorbing the information. The rain droplets dripping down, flattening his spiky hair-do. Kaidoh thought he saw tears flowing down the upper-class man's face, but by then the rain had gotten heavier and he could no longer differentiate whether they were tears or rainwater. However, his next action was completely out of Kaidoh's expectation.

"Why!" Inui shouted at Kaidoh, completely losing the cool composure that he was famous for. He reached out and pulled Kaidoh into his arms and embraced him with so much strength like he wanted to carve him into his soul. Kaidoh closed his eyes for a moment and savored the warmth for the last time, before pushing Inui away.

"Because I can't." he turned and ran, knowing that his sempai would be alright because he already had someone else waiting for him.

"Moshi Moshi?" Kaidoh picked up the telephone that had been ringing for a while. But like many calls he had been receiving lately, there was no answer. "Shhhhhh…." He hissed into the mouthpiece before hanging up. On the other side of the line, a man removed his black-framed glasses, which had lost its usual gleam.

_I'm sorry I didn't mean to call you but I couldn't fight it.  
I guess I was weak, couldn't even hide it  
and so I surrendered just to hear your voice._

Author Notes:

Hope you enjoyed the sad ending. Do read the Happy ending as well.

Yeah! I threw in YanaInu as well, that was the reason I choose Kanagawa for Kaidoh to move to.

Inui! Open your eyes there is someone else there waiting for you.

I think I tortured Inui too much in this fic.

Lastly, I wonder if anyone noticed the 2 calls at the beginning and at the ending of the story. In case you are confused and wondering, the first call was made by Kaidoh, because he misses Inui. The second call was of cause by Inui.


End file.
